Howard. Oh Howard! Such an interesting and complex guy.
He loves watching wrestling almost as much as he loves his wife of many years, Mary.
First thing you need to know about Howard is that he is not a mean and angry guy, but he likes to play that part, but it is all just a big joke to him. His deep deep humour informs almost everything he says and does – like telling the volunteers at Urban Hope that I have been banned from Urban Hope, and as they look on confused Howard cracks a smile and laughs – they fell for that old joke again.
But he wasn’t always that way.
When I first got to know Howard he could be pretty grumpy. Then he got COVID, really badly. He was hospitalized and in a coma for about 6 months. After he recovered we talked about it, and I felt he was holding something back, something important. The conversation went something like this:
Me: So what happened?
Howard: I had pneumonia and then got COVID. They said I was going to die so they put me into a coma.
Me: So did you die?
Howard: Well I’m here now.
Me: Seriously, I know about this stuff, tell me what happened.
Howard: (Uncomfortable at first but then visibly relieved at being able to tell his story.) Well it was all black then it got bright and I was with my dad (Howard’s father has been dead for years) and some of my aunts and uncles. It was really nice and I wanted to stay with them but then they told me I had to go back for Mary (Howard’s wife) so I came back.
From that time forward Howard was calmer, more at peace, more loving. His humour, which could be caustic, became mild and inviting.
Howard has become very good at hugging and listening and smiling.
